CJ Grace

Transcript

my eyes were so blurred with tears i could barely read the text on the computer screen i was checking the final corrections to my husband's latest book a tear dripped onto my handwritten notes smudging the ink our office manager sat beside me i blew my nose and told him i was suffering from terrible pollen allergies he probably was already aware of my husband's philandering i reckon i was the last one to know i just found out from a damning text message on my husband's phone what a cliche it was excruciating i'd even written a glowing forward to this latest book praising him as a loving

husband i'd written that after our 25th wedding anniversary when i thought we were closer than ever before but only a couple of months later my world came crashing down when i found out about his mistress whom he refused to give up yet i still thought my husband and i had a future together he was the love of my life the father of my kids i really wanted to be able to forgive him when i called him out about the infidelity my husband offered me a part-time wife position i'm perfectly capable of loving two women at once he declared i'd be happy spending two or three

days a week with her and the rest of the week with you i actually considered his proposal for several months trying to get my head around it could i make my husband be more loving towards me if i agreed to him seeing her as well as me he insisted it was just my conditioning that made me bulk at the idea but i worried that my husband wanted her for love and passion and only needed me around to do the taxes then i was diagnosed with breast cancer while i was going through chemotherapy my husband was at a resort in europe with his girlfriend sitting in

a chair at the clinic with an iv hookup in my arm dripping chemicals into my veins i felt an aching void it was obvious i could never stomach a part-time husband i had to give him up yet for my own peace of mind for my sanity for my health i needed to forgive both him and the young woman who was his mistress hanging to resentment was just draining my energy the last thing i needed undergoing cancer treatment i wasn't going to let him treat me like a doormat anymore but i knew i needed to forgive him truly forgive him to break the emotional hold he

had on me today i don't regret having gone through the experience of breast cancer and infidelity bleak and difficult though it was i'm actually grateful to my now ex-husband and his girlfriend forgiving them means that they don't occupy valuable real estate in my head i've got so much better things to think about these days i used to help my husband produce his books now i write my own about infidelity regret is not about the past it's about the present and i'm perfectly happy with my life as it is right now when we discover our partner's been cheating it's so easy to fall into the trap

of playing the blame game and plotting vengeance revenge is the opposite of forgiveness forgiveness allows us to move on and reclaim joy in our lives the best revenge is to get past the need for it you

Transcript generated from the recording and lightly cleaned. Some names and wording may differ from the spoken speech.