Dana Pharant

Transcript

dungeon the dungeon I will never forget the first time I stepped into the dungeon my knees were quaking what was I doing who did I think I was to try this if my submissive have been allowed to speak here to said I'm waiting for you to hold the power I'm waiting for you to take charge so that I can surrender so good I can let go of the pressures and the hundreds of decisions that I'm responsible for so how exactly did I end up in the dungeon you know dominatrix outfit we're talking black leather corset sigh high boots and a nasty little whip litigation background

so I grew up in a religious cults milder it may have been it still set the stage for abuse in fact I can remember that day when I was 14 and I gathered up my courage to tell my father what my step-brother had been doing to me and then how my stepmother intervened and declared that clearly I needed to wear more clothes by the time I was 18 I had had enough of this craziness I needed out but I was afraid like throwing up kind of afraid and even though I was scared I knew I had to do this I had to get out so

pushing past I fear I left everyone I knew all the community I'd ever trusted and I stepped out into this unknown world that began the journey of the discovery of me to unravel and untangle the mess I grew up in and sort out who I was Honore I put myself through massage College started a business got a spouse got a house got a cat I had it together on the outside at least on the inside I was dying I was lost depressed and having an affair with food in fact I remember going to the stores my friend and find one of those family sized chocolate

bars tell me my friend it's gonna last all week now I'm full well that as soon as I was alone I'd eat the whole thing I was a mess but I didn't know how to fix it I've been to every kind of therapy I could find read hundreds of self-help books then too far too many workshops but this was as good as it got until one day a new client came in to see me and she just claims to me that she was into kink and she wanted me to know so that I wouldn't be alarmed by the marks and the bruises well this sparked

something in me I needed to know more every time she came in I'd ask her more and more questions I read all the books that she lent me and still I needed more now I knew that the relationship that I was in at that time wasn't gonna allow me to explore the kink so when I finally left him the first thing I did was call up my client when's the next party cuz I'm in there's this great buddy system in the kink community where they keep an eye on the newbies and make sure that you don't end up in dangerous situations I told my buddies

I'm just going to observe that an hour later I'm sitting there with handcuffs on and an arrow after that I'm up at one of the Playstations with somebody spanking my ass so much for scoping things out and I explored my submissive side the most incredible thing happened I was able to recreate the memories from my childhood reenact the abuse and have a different outcome in a past where I thought about the memories I would feel stressed and on guard and yet this very taboo thing to do this kink world was the very thing that transformed my body for the first time I was able to

relax I was finally able to give up being hyper-vigilant I had found of peace now the healer and they thought I wonder how many other people are out there like me generous self-help stuff reading books going to therapy but nothing's really working I knew in that moment I had to take other people on this journey so I picked up the whips and discovered the gifts of being a dominatrix which brings me back to the dungeon despite my nerves despite my trepidation I took a deep breath and I owned that new rule thank you

Transcript generated from the recording and lightly cleaned. Some names and wording may differ from the spoken speech.