Lalita Dixit

Transcript

It's 300 p. m. Friday. Suddenly, the weekend is the last thing on my mind. A departmentwide team message flashes across my screen. Effective immediately, work from a particular group is moving to another team. A message seen by everyone. But the change, it only impacted one person, me. That was my work that they were talking about. Messages from my co-workers started to flood in. What's going on? Are you okay? Did you know? No, I didn't know. No phone call, no meeting, no heads up.

Leadership made a decision and announced it, overlooking the impact it had on me and the organization. Hot tears stung my eyes. How could they forget about me? Wait, was I being fired? As these thoughts raced through my mind, hours later, my manager messages me, "Can we talk?" "Yep, this is it." I thought, "I am definitely being fired." He then tells me, "Yes, I knew about the change, not about the announcement. And no, you're not being fired. We're just freeing you from some admin work."

His call too late. My sense of security and self-worth had taken a hit. And that admin work it carried legal consequences affecting the ability to hire and pay employees. It was work that I had refined, documented, and protected. I wasn't just doing the work, I was leading it. In fact, I was an undercover superstar. But just like that, my value was dismissed in a single message. Not long after, more changes are rolled out. This time, senior leadership asked for feedback. There was so much I wanted to say, but should I say it?

How many of us have had the urge to speak up, but didn't? That was me. But then I remember what it felt like to be overlooked, and I didn't want anyone else to feel that way. The changes affected more than just me. But everyone else was too afraid to say something. So I did. I wrote a six-page document, explaining the impact, outlining a transition plan, creating safeguards. When I reached out to a key stakeholder and asked, "Is there anything else you'd like me to include?"

She thanked me because I had given her a sit at the table that she had not been invited to. When I shared the document with a co-orker, she asked, "Why do you care?" I cared because leadership must be accountable for the decisions that they make that impact our work and our worth. Then, just as I was about to hit send, a knot in my stomach formed. What if they dismiss me? What if they label me as troublesome? Louder than all of those thoughts was this one question.

What will being silent cost me and the organization. I hit send. And guess what? They listened. That day I changed the narrative. It shifted how my managers and my co-workers saw me and how I saw myself. This is how I chose to lead. We spend 90,000 hours on average at work in our lifetime. It's too long to stay silent. At work, we play it safe because our jobs are tied to our pay, our security, our survival. But there comes a moment when the cost of being silent is greater than the risk of speaking up.

It is in that moment we must choose to lead. Leadership is more than just a title. It's about credibility. And credibility starts with being accountable. The moment I chose not to be silent anymore was the moment I became a leader. Thank you.

Transcript generated from the recording and lightly cleaned. Some names and wording may differ from the spoken speech.

Transcript

how are you no really how are you this question containing these three words will be the most important words you'll want to hear when you're not feeling like yourself there'll be some they'll ask out a courtesy but they don't really want to hear the answer and others that will ask again and again until they hear the truth in your voice about how you really feel I was ill for a number of months but I didn't want to face reality I was tired all the time losing weight rapidly using the restroom 20 times a day throwing up until my stomach hurt and I started to fall

asleep on my drives to and from work one day I was at a stop sign I had fallen asleep at the wheel and I had hit a truck then came the diagnosis I had Crohn's disease Crohn's disease is a chronic condition that I'll have for the rest of my life it can attack any major organ my stomach my kidneys my heart at the time of my diagnosis I was on 14 pills a day how to give six bottles of blood a week and my hair started to fall out when you're that sick it makes you feel so vulnerable that you don't want to share that

space with anyone who would you allow in this is why Community is so important while I was seeking a place to belong a group of people forms around me to create a space they were my welcome committee my ambassadors my maintenance crew this is my story about my journey with crohn's disease and the family and friends that played various roles in my community to help me get better they were there when I awoke from the colonoscopy my welcome committee ready to teach me the rules of my new community I found myself in this group consisted of my parents my sister and my brother-in-law they took

me to my doctor appointments gave me all my medicines and devised a protocol should I fall ill in essence they helped to orientate me to living with the disease after we all became familiar with crohn's instant facts they became my greatest ambassadors I had a lot of ambassadors along the way an ambassador in a community are those people who you seek when you have questions or concerns my first concern was not being able to use the bathroom at other people's homes because I'd be there for a very long time my best friend and his wife said to me it's just us you need to feel

comfortable in our home we're not going to judge you my second concern was my tendency to toss my cookies hurl on occasion when I threw up at a friend's barbecue she said this to me Lolita you're not well we just want you to get better what do you need from us my third concern which you clearly cannot tell right now is this my luxurious Mane back then due to my medications it started to fall out my girlfriend took one look at it and said that is temporary it is going to grow back my ambassadors in my community helped me set my roots and find my

place within it honestly when you're sick all you want to do is feel normal as a result of the disease being chronic I was pretty popular at a lot of hospitals I was very grateful to my maintenance crew but check in with you and see how you're doing they're the ones who came to the hospital held my hand told me stories made sure they stayed up with me late at night on the phone and made me smile they always reassured me that this was just a temporary stop in my journey to recovery normalcy it's overrated when you're sick my significant other when I told him

I have this disease for the rest of my life said to me whatever you go through will go through together I want to be the one to take care of you without my community I would not be here today they've seen me at some of the lowest points and some of the highest with this disease I was on 14 pills a day and went down to two within one year I struggled to run 100 meters and then completed a full Marathon finally I could not speak to anyone about this disease and here I am speaking to you without judgment or fear my community helps me

heal next time someone says to you how are you listen the first time but pay close attention to those who ask no really how are you thank you

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