Samantha Kinoshameg

Transcript

in Ojiway language that's just a greeting that tells you who I am and where I come from so that you can check me out later if you're not too sure about me. But I want to talk a little bit about my title, No Guts, No Glory, because that feeling that I get in the pit of my stomach that terrifies me sometimes makes me want to vomit and I don't know if I'm going to be okay. That feeling in my arms that ripples up into my chest when I don't know what I'm going to do next because I'm terrified and I don't know if I can take that next step, if I can take that thing forward.

But what I have come to appreciate is how I was raised, my parents, my family. I'm eight years old and I'm getting ready to go to a pow-wow and I don't have a regalia made yet. So, our programs, somebody was teaching me how to sew, how to pick colors, how to celebrate life. And I'm really excited because I have picked out this beautiful yellow fabric with purple flowers. I picked out a green ribbon. I picked out a purple ribbon. I cut out my pattern.

It had a simple tea dress across the top, down below, all the way to my ankles. And I'm really excited for this. I cut it out. I sew the ribbons on under, of course, guidance. And I'm really excited because I get to go to Ottawa with my auntie Martina who's going to take us and a bunch of cousins to this great great summer event. But I'm not finished. Unfortunately, I'm was a little slow. I'm eight, so I, you know, need to take a little bit of time, which is always a lesson that I have to learn.

And so I bring the dress home. All I have to do is sew it together. So I'm excited. I pull out my mom's sewing machine. I set it up, thread the machine, think, "Okay, this is it. I'm going to going to sew this thing." I start setting it up. Push the pedal down. Crunch. The needle won't go down. I don't know what to do. Did I just break my mom's sewing machine? What am I supposed to do now? I look at it trying to go back and forth.

It's not working. I don't know what I'm going to do. How am I going to go to a pawa without a regalia? How am I going to go dance at this gathering? So, 8-year-old me says, "Oh, well, I guess if I can't do this, I'm going to rip it out." I didn't rip it out. I use scissors, cut it out, and I grabbed a needle and thread and I sewed my whole dress by hand because I was desperate to go to this pow-wow because the sound of that drum I learned is the heartbeat of our mother.

And when you get that chance to go listen to go and dance, it's one of those things that you can't you can't help but want to get up and dance. So, I'm really excited. I'm going to do this. So, every time I get that feeling in my stomach, every time I get that feeling of, oh gosh, I don't know what I got to do. I remember when I was eight, I actually sewed my dress by hand. All of that stuff about knowing what to do next was within me.

How is I going to do this? How am I going to do that? And I thought, oh my goodness. Like, it's true. All we have to do is look within, feel that in your guts, feel that in your stomach, feel that energy that ripples through you, and you can take that next step forward. The other part that I always think about is the uh the two things. one, there's a line from a a beautiful prayer from a Lakota elder from the 1800s and he said, "Let my eyes ever behold those red and purple sunsets."

And when I hear that when I was eight as a kid, I think about that. How many days do we have? How many seasons do we get? We should be celebrating each day, each red and purple sunset. And I think when you're not sure about what to do, when you're feeling like an underdog, what can you do? You can think about that sunset. You can look outside yourself, but also remember the strength that you have within you. And this brings me to my other line that I really loved when I was a kid.

He said, "Give me strength not to fight my brother, not to fight my sister, but to fight my greatest enemy, myself." And I think about those words every time I'm getting ready to make a big decision, anytime I'm getting ready to support somebody else to say, you know what, you have it within you. You have it in your guts. And with that saying, no guts, no glory. Take a step forward and walk into the light. Miguel.

Transcript generated from the recording and lightly cleaned. Some names and wording may differ from the spoken speech.