Body Beautiful · 2023
Free to Shine: My Journey to Self-Acceptance
Mar 20, 2023Online competition
Speaking on the theme Body Beautiful at Speaker Slam®'s online competition in Mar 20, 2023, Åsa Rydhard took the stage with a five minute story.
Transcript
at least that is what my mother told me when I was 11 years old we were out shopping together and I tried home the most amazing dress filled with flowers and Ruffles and all the girls had one I was admiring myself in the mirror when my mother came into the fitting room looked at me and said once you were such a cute little girl who would believe that now obviously she did not I was big with flaky skin and two big boobs too soon not at all skinny and cute like my sister I was very talkative multi-talented and a gifted girl with cross stains on
my knees no one told me that I was amazing because they couldn't see that so I couldn't see that either school I was an easy target hey big boobs the boys shouted after me in the corridor but when I fought back punching and kicking in anger I was the one taken inside and being punished back at home my mother saw my face all swollen and wet of tears and she said but you you don't really care do you I grew up and now on the outside I was successful very independent and strong but deep inside I was still a little girl fighting and kicking to
set my boundaries and holding myself back afraid of being rejected my family wasn't happy at all about my success it came to a fight where I held on to my right to be myself and they demanded that everything should be as it always been in the last attempt to reach out to my mother I've wrote to her mom I always felt like an outsider like I'm not included in the family and she responded I've asked your dad and your sister and they agree with me this is not true there was nothing more I could do about this to survive I had to move on and
find people who loved to see me shine and I did this body brought me to amazing places and people I played my music I painted my pictures of entertained on stages I had so much fun so much love and so much food thanks to this imperfectly perfect body I've had experiences that show shaped me into who I am today I got love handles laughing smiles and stretch marks on my belly from pregnancies this body is like a walking scrapbook of reminders about what is really important in life when I look at pictures of myself as a teenager I can see that I was as cute
as anyone and then I remember the feeling of loneliness and how sad I always was and I wish that I could have been there and tell my teenage self but I will tell you now that life is not about being perfect on the surface to please others a good life is to be free to shine from inside out and what you really need is people who love you for who you are because you are amazing and if you are not appreciated if no one sees your value it simply means that you ended up at the wrong place and even if it's your own family you
need to move on I know it's hard but beautiful you will find people who love your amazingness so let yourself be free to shine
Transcript generated from the recording and lightly cleaned. Some names and wording may differ from the spoken speech.
Healing · 2022
Find Your Courage to Lead
Jun 2022Online competition
Speaking on the theme Healing at Speaker Slam®'s online competition in Jun 2022, Åsa Rydhard took the stage with a five minute story.
Transcript
at one point of my career i was a pastor the leader of aggregation being a woman i was admired for my courage as a leader i felt at home on my farm in a little village and i loved living on the countryside with my family growing our own food feeding the horses before heading off to work it was a perfect life and i needed it to be perfect because i wanted to be a perfect leader a role model then everything changed due to painful divorce i had to move out of my home away from the village my children wanted to stay on the farm friends
and families disappeared and i was left more and more isolated at work i overheard someone saying if you can't keep an orderly household how can you be fit to lead the congregation those words they put me in the darkest of places where i was a total failure not fit to lead anyone anymore i had to fight so hard to swallow my tears i was constantly on my guard i was ashamed and i had that crazy idea that if i didn't open up to anyone no i would knew when i could continue being that perfect leader that i believed people wanted but of course people knew
rumors and my silence made them suspicious some believed i was the blame for the failure of my marriage others saw me as a fraud a liar i felt so unwanted and lonely standing at midnight on my balcony on the 10th floor a big black hole of emptiness overwhelmed me and i was so tempted to take that step into nothingness but i couldn't find the courage even for that instead i ate myself through 23 pints of ben jerry's before luckily new friends showed up friends that wanted to be there for me they were not at all perfect they had scars they had struggles of their own
but they understood they knew how hard a divorce can be it was like to lose your job actually they were just one step ahead of me but following their lead i could move forward step by step things got better and better a new kind of life started to be possible i could see it touch it at that point one of my friends turned to me and said you you got an unusual opportunity to reinvent your life but do you have the courage that made me think about myself about leaders in general and their situation you know how hard one worked how how lonely you often
are and in my new life i wanted to be there for other leaders like my friends had been there for me and helped them move forward and make a difference today i work as an executive trainer and the speaker and i constantly meet so many talented leaders and experts carrying scars that they are ashamed of and i'm i'm so happy that i can use my experiences to help them understand that they are good enough there is no use to beating yourself up saying i'm not good enough i have nothing to offer i can't lead anyone because that's simply not true because people like you and
me we don't want perfect we just want someone to help us move forward step by step and that someone could be you you just need to be one step ahead and find your courage to take the lead and show up for your people in need you
Transcript generated from the recording and lightly cleaned. Some names and wording may differ from the spoken speech.
